Holidays Schmolidays

This weekend was just another weekend. Nothing spectacular...nothing overwhelming...it just was. These past couple weeks I've been rather quiet cause too much is happening and although I don't give a fuck who knows my bidness...I suppose this month I do. This has probably been both equally the best and the worst month of my life. Hahahaha...not to compare it to the time my mother went to prison for 5 years and I had to moved from my school with all my friends to bumfuck Oklahoma...that probably was the shittiest...but I digress.

I've been really rather emotionally detached as of late. Trying hard to keep life in perspective. Keep things moving and flowing. Making life decisions and make sure 100 percent about them. I believe I've all but decided I'm moving back to Idaho next Fall...going to ISU and getting my own place. Its a rather huge decision considering I'll finally be going to school to make something of myself and my love hate relationship with Idaho. I love it cause that's where I grew up and had an actual childhood. I believe growing up on my rez is something I wouldn't trade for the world. And the mountains...man there is nothing like growing up with mountains in your backyard. There just ain't. But then again...it's always been a source of contraversy for me. The center of my contraversy. My mother. Oh my mother, my biological, real, dramatic, crazy, alcoholic mom. I love her, yes I do. But I dunno...just bad memories of the afforementioned I suppose. That and those other dark things about your childhood you don't speak of...hahahaha...DRAMATIC!

Meh...



I'm giving myself 6 more months in DC and then I'm outtie. Not cause I don't love it here...I absoeffinlutely do. Its just that its time for me to start taking my future seriously. Perhaps get degree...settle down...venture into the oh so scary realm of life partnership...who the eff knows. All I know it that I'll be closer to my little brother...who has always been the center of heart and I've just put off being the big sister for a while. He needs me and I need him more than ever. I'm sufficently satisfied that my sister is going to have the life she always deserved and that my father is always always going to be fine without me. I'm starting to sound like I'm leaving tomorrow...ha.

So anyhow...yeah...that's where my head is at...thoughs of "home"...how ever that looks...

And a great Friday it is indeed. *nods*

Well the aftermath of the incident is that yes...NO ONE was hurt. The wallets will have a huge dent but those are the prices we pay for making stupid, very well avoidable mistakes. Lesson learned.

A friend of mine was generous and crazy enough to buy me a plane ticket to Las Vegas next week. I was honored and kind of taken back but then again you can't say no to a gift. It's rude. (or at least that's what I'm telling myself these days) so Next wednesday @ EST 4:55 I will be in the air to Chicago and then from Chi-town to Sin City. Good times. I'm going to be the "escort" for a friend to a wedding. The exact same friend I was suppose to marry back in March as a goof but didn't quite make it...(If any of y'all can remember that) Kinda scary now that you think about it...what if we do get married? OMGz......

Then just imagine two weeks after I get back from Las Vegas I'll be in the air flying to Florida to get on a big ol ship to the Bahamas. Again...my ex's family is paying for the whole thing so don't be going thinking I'm rich or anything...I'm sooooooooooo not. I just have that something that people are willing to pay to be around...maybe I should be an actress or something? Never know...it could happen.... *wicked smile*

*~Happy Friday, People~*

Yeah...Quit drinking for a loooong while..

if not forever...

All I'll say is...Getting the boot from the concert...Sister not remember concert...very smashed in hood...DUI...Not mine but I let my sister drive drunk. Worst sister ever...I think so. It sucks. Expensive lesson learned that should never have been learned. :( C'est la vie.

Volleyball and The raddest concert ever...

Last night I played my first game of volleyball with this All Native Girls team they got here in Gaithersburg. We're the Native Slammers....lol. Man I was kinda scurd at first cause I haven't played since 4 ever but last night I must admit was fucking fun ass hell! Man we lost our first 3 games but man...that 4th game we all got our groove and became a team...fuck it was magic! I loved it to death! I haven't lost my serving touch and I ain't even all that sore. I'm so proud of myself. Yeah son.

Tomorrow I'm soo effin excited cause I got practice in the morning and the me and my momishu (™Dangerous Angel...my sister) are going to see the fucking raddest concert of the year!

5:00 Keane
5:30 My Chemical Romance
6:10 Breaking Benjamin
6:50 Chevelle
7:35 The Killers
8:20 Franz Ferdinand
9:05 Jimmy-Eat World
10:00 Good Charlotte
11:00 Velvet Revolver

Fucking Aye I can't wait. I'm so excited! I am so wanting to meet Chevelle it's sick! Man...What I wouldn't do for that Band...For fucking Pete...I love them. I need to make me a new shirt cause the last one I had a friend jacked up for me. So I need a new one!

Enough of that Jazz....I'll write more later...but I had to get that off my chest for now. ;) Toodles.

Is it winter yet?

Today is either going to be an awesome day or a shitty one.
Depending on how you look at it.

Today I've committed to quitting drinking alcohol (cept for an exception on Dec. 4th and maybe once on a certain TBA trip), drinking soda, and smoking cigarettes...(cept for spiritual purposes but I don't any arise) for a month (cigarettes indefinately). Wish me luck.

I've also committed to a race to be the biggest loser in a contest with my sweet bitch Natasha aka Ah Satan. Today is our official weigh in and we have til January 1st with weigh in's every week. The prize? As for now it's just the greatest bitch of all time. We may think of something better but where both competitive so competing for a saltine would suffice. I love you, Satan.

This morning looks so dark and gloomy that it may as well be 6 in the evening. Seriously. It's all rainy and sad outside...and me with no Jazz...BOO....Madeleine Peyroux would be good here...

Fucking aye...I JUST ran out of Dr. Pepper lip smackers. What the fuck am I going to do now. Dry lips! Perish the thought...I think I'm going to have to call Kip to bring me my chapstick.

It's been way too long...

I miss you guys. I miss this. I've been missing and gone for so long I don't know where I am anymore. At this particular point I am happy and peaceful. So much has happened and so much to come. I'll get down on this in due time. In the mean time, people. You should get up on this song Right click and save as here I love you guys. Miss J00!

My Trip to New York Part Un...

Well, well, well...

Where to start. Friday, I wake up @ 8 o'clock and scramble to get all my shit together. I was barely packed so I had to neatly stuff all my shit into two duffle bags. Plus, I the little things that you try not to forget and somehow end up leaving anyway. (like your cell phone and toothbrush!) And in doing so I was very very LATE! Kelli and I had planned to take off @ 10:00 and here I am doing the breast stroke in my sea of clothes @ 9:30. Clever.

So I finally jet out the door @ 9:40. Kelli is pissed I know. I hate making my sister mad but I do it anyways cause I'm a tard. Anyways, I get there and she has to burn some car music for our trip. Kewl. Then they remember she needs a new headlight. *goodness* So the honda goes to the doctor for a bit. We're stressed. It's not like we have to be anywhere. But we're hella late for our time and so we're rushed. Car done, Cd's done, and finally out the door by 12! *Whew* No Heart girls are never on time.

So off we go, turn up the jams and hit the road. Just me and my sister. Ah life is sweet. It took us freakin 7.5 hours to get to NYC. Fucking an hour of that was just waiting on to get off the New Jersey Turnpike on to the Lincoln tunnel. Since we don't have to be to our destination til about 9:15 or so we decide to mess around in Time Square. We have a drink @ Howard Johnsons and our bartender is no more than 19. She's so cute with her lit-uhl New Yawk accent. She's crazy. But she proceeds to tell me I am cause I drove 7.5 hours to meet a stranger. I said yeah, that's true, hopefully it's worth it.

We mess around New York somemore. Hitting up some stores. Getting the obligatory I love NY shirt. Saw Catwoman. Unfortunately missed the Naked Cowboy. (DAMN!) And talked to my Aunt Daisy to she could tell us where to go. It's getting late and Erick give us a reminder call to leave the City cause we have another hour to go to the heart of Long Island. We get the scoop on the nights happenings, grab a couple bites @ Mc Donald's of all places (Sorry NYC Pizza, next time my love) and take off to Queens Bridge Tunnel....

Soooo....on to Erick's...

It's 9:30. We're so late. But when are we ever on time? We start driving and then we realize we're probably ew-er than ew so we stop at a Gas Station to freshen up. (Yes, Erick, case solved) We stopped to put make up on and change clothes at a gas station because
A: Fuck I was so nervous it was beyond ridiculous.
B: I had stains my my shirt and you only get one chance to make a first impression.

So, we do our biznass and move along. The drive seemed to go by so fast yet the last 10 exits dragged on for-ev-er...and it seemed the closer I got the more nervous I got. And the more nervous I got I started to give myself stomache pains. It was aweful. Some randum girl called me right before I got to Erick's which was totally weird. It was a 202 . and I was like WTF? So I answer it. Conversation as follows:

Meh: "Yo"
Her: "Yo, is this KT?"
Meh: "Yeah, who is this?"
Her: 'Are you Gay?"
Meh: "Um...I'm bi-sexual"
Her: "Oh. What color iz you?"
Meh: "Brown? What the fuck does it matter? Who is this?"
Kell from the side: "Who are you talking to?"
Meh to Kelli: "Fuck if I know!"
Kelli: "Well why the hell are you telling them all this information?"
Meh to Kelli: "I don't know, don't yell at me"
Meh to girl: "Look I gotta go yo. I don't know who you are or how you got my . but late."

I know that was really lame and irrelavant but with all the tension Kelli got pissed at me and I at her and that so was not going to work. In about 10 minutes I get to meet a boy that I've had a crush on for almost over a month now and me and my sister fighting is the way to greet someone. Crazy! So following our crazy directions to Erick's house we get lost like 3 times. Not to mention he happens to be the only house without a . on it so the first house we stop at isn't his. At least we got a laugh out of that one and it relieved some tension.

Finally, moment of truth. We got the right town, we got the right street and we finally got the right house. Now to knock on the right door. He opens the door and he's exactly the way I imagined he would be and he give me this big reassuring hug. Awesome. He give Kelli a hand shake and I immediately bolt for the O cause I need to chill the fuck out. We sit and chill for a while to wait for a friend. Talk a bit about this and that. Friend doesn't show so we go to his house to check it out.

Seems he's too tired to hang out with us. So with one last failed try to get more partners in crime we head to the bar place (forgot the name.) Before we arrive we had to get some nurishment in that slender frame of his cause he hadn't eaten yet. Much to our detriment we stopped by a Wendys and he gets the necessary bi-products to fill his little tummy. Not being able to smoke in his car I wait til we arrive @ the bar to smoke. He proceeds to finish his food with the car off and me and Kelli congregate outside for a smoke. After he finishes, he gets out and we head on over to the bar.

Lady luck being the fickle bitch that she is Erick realizes all but too late that he left his keys in the car...and he has automatic locks! *yey!* He goes back and assesses possibilities only concluding to one. Hmmm... Plan A: Lemme break this window. I on the other hand, having just been with someone with broken window the weekend before, was highly against it. No way, Jose. That'll will suck, think of something else. Plan B ask someone for a hanger or a slim jim. Plan B futile. Plan C: Wait for someone he knows outside the club for help. Plan C sucess! A friend of a friend calls another for the number to Triple A (Which just happens to be 1-800-Triple A in case you're interested) et voila! Erick remember, Duh! I have Triple A! Call Triple A. The come amazingly quick and the night is saved!

To be continued...

Lip Rings, Foam & Broken Glass....

That was the story of my night. In a nutshell.

I spent an obscene amount of money on stupid face jewlery and I swear I was possesed when I bought the shit cause only two of what I bought I actually like. Go me.

All I wanted to do last night was dance. My pal wanted to hang out cause he had nothing betta to do so we did. He went to Nation with me. So I got there a little late for open bar and since I paid my effin $15 bucks to get in...I was going to get my money back in drinks and then some. haha 8 cran and vodka's later I finally get on the dance floor. If my friend wasn't sending me tha boredum vibes I would have tore it up but alas...

so in between the vodka and dancing I was getting a little tired and the night was still young. Not wanting to give up totally on my quest to make the most of what I had I saw the doors to the outside were open. So I told my pal...lets go mang.

So we go and Guess what I see...

FOAM!

NIGHT SAVED! I immediately jump in and get my ass all soapy foam wet and it was great. Even my friend had fun! I thought it would be damn near impossible for that to happen. We danced for about an hour and then called it quits cause there is only so many bubbles I can breathe in and not get sick. So quitting while we were ahead....we head home.

That is when...we saw his window. Broken in. Stereo...stolen. I was like um...babe...your window is missing dear. He didn't drink a lick so I thought his head was going to splode. I managed to convice him to file a report despite it not doing anyone any good. The police came took the report and that was that. The guy managed to cut himself pretty good cause there was a considerable amount of blood. Karma Karma Karma. C'est la vie.

Well Well Wow

I just got through watching Big Fish for the first time. It was a really great movie. I really didn't know what I was expecting or what I wanted to take away from it. All I know is that it inspired me to think about this particular moment in my life. It made me realize something about my life that I probably wouldn't have though of any other way. That's what I love so much about movies. Movies are a catalyst for the way I believe I want my life to be.

Big Fish, as animated and beautiful as it was, made me think of the events that have happened in these past few weeks. All the ways I've been feeling and perhaps a validation for the way that I feel. One of the events that I have been pondering is one that I don't regret but makes me sad inside. This weekend I had to let down a guy that in all essence should be perfect for me. He's smart, intelligent, funny, attractive and he's a great great mentor and motivator. He came up to DC just to see me. And I didn't realize until it was already done. And he told me how he felt and how he feels about me to my amazement and in all honestly discontent. Maybe what he offered could've been good. And maybe I could have considered it. But it wasn't romantic. It wasn't the way I dreamed a moment like that would come. He told me in the throws of drunkness that he loved me and that he wanted to fall in love with me. At that moment I was speechless. I was sadend throughout because no matter heartfelt it was, no matter how true and real, how could he expect me to accept such an offer and actually take into my life like it meant something.

I just broke up an 8 year friendship cause I can't stand alcholics and alcholic men in my life. I'm through and done with it. That's why I've been single for so long. Cause I don't want that or anything to do with a relaionship like that. I don't want any of it. I left that life back in Idaho and Oklahoma only for it to follow me here? I left all that I knew and the people I loved to find something better than myself, to find myself and my own way. What's right for Spring and what makes Spring happy in this world.

I have finally started feeling something for someone. A person unbeknownst to me but who gives me butterflies in my stomache again and makes me smile like no other. He's not my type and he is so not what I would probably pick for myself had I not become so smitten so fast. There is an Aries for you, always failing to look before you leap. All I know is that even though we don't talk everyday or have even met. We feel so much and it's awesome and great and perfect with all it's tiny imperfections. Like a dream. Like a movie. He makes me feel beautiful despite myself. And calms my worries just by saying so. I don't know what I did to deserve such blinded affection. All I know is that I am blinded by my affection for him.

So with that, and all things being considered now now have a chance to meet. In two weeks, during Labor Day, I am going to Long Island New York. To meet the man-child that has all so clumsily stolen my heart. The Shinnecock Pow-wow is going on at that time so he has oh so generously agreed to let me stay at his house in the Hamptons. I had no clue when I first met him that he lived in the Hamptons because that seems totally unreal and makes me laugh at myself. How the heck did I snare a boy from the Hamptons? The world may never know.

In the mean time, I had to let down the man that should be my ideal. Why? Cause of all the things that are perfect about him, he hides the courage he easily gives others from himself and inside a bottle. He had not the courage to ever say this sober and for that I can't. I love him and I always will. But for now it can never be. I'm not ready to give up my life again to move back to a place that has no oppertunity for me. No more than I can ask him to move out here just so we can get to know eachother the way we should have in the 8 months that we've known eachother. That's just not my way. Plus, Im too young and cute to be anyones mom. *AYE* (he has a 9 month old)

So now, I'll buck up and be the adventureous Aries. Swallow my pride and meet this guy that I probably have a chance in hell with. A guy I have nothing in common with and not even on the same plane with. Why? Cause it's crazy. And I'm crazy. And life is crazy and without moments like these...how would be know we are alive. Those who take the biggest risks, get the biggest rewards. And those with nothing to lose have everything to gain. That's the way I've been living my life and that's the way I will continue to do so.

Such is my life and it is blessed.

You know your are a dork when...

Little shit like this makes you uber happy...

Him: I think it's about time I started running around like a moron and doing all the things I should have started a week ago dear. But, know that I'll be thinkin about you while I'm away.
Me: Aight. Well have a great night and weekend if I don't get to chat with you later.
Me: Good luck on not hooking up with the trannies tonite
Me: :-D
Him: I make no promises.
Him: I mean...
Him: Take care dear

Yeah...I'm totally freakin smitten...and I love it. (Can you say e-tard?)

I gave my panties to a nerd

That how I feel today. I feel like I'm Samantha and this is the day from hell. It just feels blah.



I need to find my Jake Ryan! The person that makes me feel beautiful, sexy and loved just to be around them. And have them feel the same way about me. As much as I want him, I suppose I'll have to wait. I need to get back into school first and become a geek. *rawr*

While I was thinking about it I though I would do my very belated check in with my new year's resolutions. *tee hee*
Beginning of the year I was I was going to:

1. Learn to become the kick-ass skier I know I really am.
2. Learn to become the kick-ass guitar player I know I really am.
3. Learn to become the bad-ass golfer I know I really am.
4. Actually utilize my Gym membership.
5. Spend more time with my little brothers.
6. Stay single for an entire year. (NO MORE PRETTY BOYS!!!!)
7. Appriciate myself more the my accomplishments.
8. Earn at least 12 credits this year. (ha ha ha)
9. Telling all the co-dependants in my life to flick off and do it yourself once in a while.
10. Smoke only 185 days this year instead of all 365.
11. Stop smokin' da crack pipe.
12. Not forget anyone's birthday.
13. Fly myself to Hawaii for my Birthday.
14. Get my milkshake to bring all the boys to the yard.
15. Not give a damn about what the price of rice in china is.

Now I am...

1. Waiting til the new skii season...Go me.
2. Guitar...what guitar....must make some calls.
3. Bad Ass Golfer...Maybe golden tee...perhaps I'll makes some calls.
4. Just cancelled. I have my own mini-gym @ home.
5. Haven't seen them yet. I need to badly.
6. Well I've managed that so far. Single with a crush...hopeless romantic.
7. Hmm...what have I accomplished this year...oh yeah...my own place *pat on back*
8. Again...I will say ha ha ha....
9. Hey I did it for Roach and look where she is now. Her own place too. *pat on back*
10. yeah...cutting down as we speak...*lights up another*
11. This was just a metaphor for get a fuckin life. I have a nice one so far.
12. I don't think I did. Everyone got a call or a card or comments.
13. Didn't do that....maybe I'll buy the ticket this year for next year.
14. Well if you count my avatar then go me.
15. Yeah...i still working on not sweating the small stuff.

What I would like to do before the end of the year:

1. At least pick a school and get enrolled.
2. Pay my fees to get my licence back.
3. Learn to effin drive stick. I'm 24 for Ingalls sake.
4. Accept the hopeless romantic that I am and love myself for being so.
5. Quit drinkin and smoking to pay for the trip to Hawaii.

We'll see how it goes.

Guess who called me last night?

I know you are going to think I am a psychopath skitzo but it's true. Why the fuck else would I say it?




I know right now your either saying...that ugly fucker, or what the fuckever or bullshit...

BUT alas, I don't care, it did and I am mad thrilled.

How could such an event happen?

My brother who has the dumbest fucking luck meeting celebs works @ the Hustlers Club down in New Orleans. He works the late night shift and during there shift rotations he works VIP. So alas, my brother is not one to be shy...and knowing at the one time I had a crush on this fool, has Vin Say hello to me on the phone. All I could say was omg...I love you...you are...OMG...I love you...He laughed and was like your brother is one cool dude. And I said thanks for the call and even talking to me...your awesome and he was like no problem, now you take care and handed the phone back to my brother. I love/hate my brother. I've been having trouble with insomnia lately and that phone call didn't help things. Suffice to say...I was on cloud nine. Still am.

Last night, I got to hang with one of my bestest buds in the EAST...Pacito. We went to go see AVP. (I'll get to that review in a second) I missed that little guy so bad. He is the true nerd to my dork. I can tell that guy anything and he me. I know there are at lest 4 people that can really invoke thoughts into my psyche. 1# my Numi, 2# my fucker, #3 Benji, and #4 Paco. They are all like my gurus with Numi being my social, Fucker being my practical/clarity, Benji being my logical, and paco more like emotional. After AVP, we went to his place and chilled for a sec and then he walked me home. We had a good talk about this and that. His love interest and mine. How I try so hard to be hard and tough when I'm just a softie romantic that wants the romance. It doesn't give me pleasure in admitting that its true. Inherently, I know that which I'm sure everyone does. But it's really hard for me to admit. And when I become smitten with someone...I'm gone. So suffice to say we had a great conversation and a great night. I wouldn't have seen AVP with anyone else in the world and it's great having him back. Hopefully we'll hang out again soon.

AVP: While I will admit the cinematography was most excellent and better than I thought it would come out, the one hundred and thirty minutes of PG-13ness was irrevokably sad. Who ever composed such dialouge needs to be shot. It wasn't even original. "The enemy of my enemy is my friend? (Grasshoppa)" Give me a break. It was Mystery Science Theater up in that piece. I've never laughed so hard in my life. The only thing that was lacking that I thought would have made a great addition to the overall theme would have either 1. a kiss or 2. at least a high five! C'mon! Can I get a high five please? At the end, I was so waiting for him to break out with..."You got the juice now..." (And can a bitch a friggin ride please? Thanx)

Anyways, back to my hole...Ciao Bailas.

Randum shit...like whoa...or whatever.

Speaking of which, I heard that they are showing a re-make/re-did/whatever the fuck of Donnie Darko. Inserting scenes that were left out so the movie would make more sense. Tight ass. My dad saw it in New York this past weekend and was telling me about it. So if I can't find it around town then I'm am so going to New York this weekend. Donnie Darko and the NYC, tyte ass. I miss that damn city. ~if only for the pizza~

Certain cities have certain feels to them that I just friggin miss. Chicago just seems so sophisticated and old. I like Chicago in the winter. It's beautiful. The second time I ever went to Chicago I went by myself. The company I was working for always had a Christmas party that was not to be missed and they actually paid for me to go! It was insane. They had a kewl dj and kareoke, the Dinner buffet was off the chain and something I've never seen. ( I didn't realize food was THAT pretty) Then I made friends with some interns they took me around the city despite me not having a fake ID (I was 19 at the time). I had a good time but this dude kinda go mad cause we didn't bone. (I'm like yeah right poin dexter)

This one lady even took me to see a show downtown. A Tuna Christmas...that shit was hillarious. Finding my way home was even more hillarious. They just had a fucking blizzard up there and the bus lines only go so far at night. So I ended up walking cause downtown there was not a cab to be had. So lucky for me my ex's sister lived there and helped me find home. I walke 8 blocks in fucking heals and a skirt in the snow after the bus stopped short of just where I needed to be. Now that's something to tell the kids. (when I was your age...I walked blah blah blah in the snow)

Ah Chicago. It's not as showy or glizy like the NYC but It'll do. It has a real jazzy feel that I can't get enough of. Chicago almost feels like Paris but not quite. Paris always is and always will be my first love.

Anyways...brain droppings of the day.

Today I feel like writing so yey!

Yesterday was a weird day. Well I guess the past 24 hours.
(This maybe long so if you read it god speed)


*some names witheld to protect the innocent and incredibly sexy*

I had stayed up the night before chatting on the net til the break of dawn and didn't get any sleep before I went to work. There is no good rational for staying up all night when I had to work. I, for some odd reason, just felt compelled to talk to my friends on the net, especially one in particular and loved every minute. I oddly was never really tired. I never yawned or felt the urgent need to sleep. I just kept chatting and smiling incredibly hard and laughing so loud I probably woke up my dad a couple times.

One member of my insane chat posse (ICP, yeah, son!) made me smile and blush so profusely it was ridiculous. (Thanx again for keeping me up, sugar and don't forget dinner is on me, aight) One kept making me laugh so hard you think I was high. (Tashie <3's Cowboys! Yee-haw! *LOL*) One was getting tipsy and sending me E-Cape Cods. (Next time lets get tipsy together, m'kay. *LOL*) One kept askin for my pink taco. (it's in the mail, homie...) One was in desperate need of porn cause they were horny. (it's in the mail, homie...lol...<3 u Chick!) And the other must have thought I was dead crazy because he kept tellin me to go to bed. I was like "In a minute...I will...Seriously...in a minute" (You know I heart you...I heart you alot.).

All in all it was a great night I didn't want to end but I had to get ready for work. The good thing about staying up all night is that I was finally up early enough to eat breakfast. That was a major plus. I even ironed my clothes! *Wow!* (cause if you know me I'm hella lazy and make my friends do it) I took a shower, ate my breakfast, took my Xenedrine (to help me stay awake) and I left early cause I knew I needed a Mocha Frappe majorly and a Red Bull. (not a fan of red bull but when you're desprate, you're desprate)

Made it to work and it wasn't all that bad. Thankfully, my job is seriously low maintenence and doesn't require me to operate heavy machinery. That helped alot. I did my upmost not to bite anyone's head off. Even though SOMEONE was effin plucking my last nerve cause they were jealous and acting childish. I made it through the day okay and interestingly still not tired. James wanted to celebrate the birth of her new god-baby. (Congrats, JAMES!) So you know how we do...We gotta celebrate!

So after work she picks me up and we go to Ruby Tuesdays cause they got the "buy one get one for 1 cent" drafts (It's a good deal when its not happy hour) and James and Lyds were hungry as hell. We stayed there for a couple and then went to Champs to finish out happy hour. I was still doing fine but I was beginning to run on fumes. Kina wanted to play me on the Golden Tee so we do. I was kickin ass. Then Kina switched out and I played Benji for a bit. And everything was going fine...still doing fine despite the obvious lack of sleep. That is until I completely missed the controller ball and jammed my hand into the machine. I don't know why I held off from crying. I held it in and tried so hard not to cry. Well that was the worst made decision in the world cause holding it in + Lack of sleep + about 5 or so beers = Me VERY all of a sudden depressed. And I began to be really depressed about stupid shit and un-necessary things.

So in my new found depression I had to make a phone call. To who? I had no clue. I didn't wanna call my numi in state I was in. So I tried to call my brother. He didn't answer and that made me all the more depressed. So there I was, using a friends phone, didn't have any one to talk to and I didn't want to bring down the party so I smoked a cig and went inside. I pouted to Benji cause I thought I was ass out on the drunken depressed call to friends until I realized he had Satan's #. (Yey, I was saved!) So I call Satan of all people and she listens to me rant for I don't know how long about this, that and the other. I just ranted and ranted til I got it off my chest. And after listening to me til I cant rant anymore, she begins tells me whats on her mind. Listening to her made me feel better. Alot better. Depression magically disappeared and I was back to the me of things. (I love you Satan)

Next on the list is going to Lesbian night @ Apex. I had to go home and get out of my girlie clothes (I was way to cutesty like a school marm) and get into some dancing clothes cause I fully intended to rip up the floor. Some members of our party wanted to ziff on a spliff while I changed so they did. (Thanx for opening the window fuckers!) I was too gone for make up so we left for the club and had an excellent time. Lyds bought me some Mickey Deez cause I needed to come down off the drunk tank. And despite a little drama from the chics we met up with. I had a great time. I even got home @ 12 (Yey early enough for me to get SOME sleep). They dropped me off and I got into my bed attire. And as soon as my head it the pillow, I was out.

So that was my day. Nothing especially out of the ordinary but it still "felt" weird. I purpoly left out the drama cause I ain't havin it. I'm glad I made it alive and I'm glad that I was able to hang enough to enjoy the special times with my friends. Thanx for everyone that helped me out last night. Lyds I owe you one. One day on those rare occasions that my brain remembers that I don't smoke pot so it shouldn't kirk out on me like that I will call you for lunchtime debauchery.

LATE!

Jesus, I am teh Ghey!

Spring in love?

Jesus I hope not! But I am developing the hugest crush on my myspace buddy Erick. The love hate relationship I have with myspace (mostly love) I've gotten to know this incredible dork who effin lights up my world with a simple hi. Why? I have to freakin clue! It's so outside of me I can't begin to comprehend. Why is it worthy of mention? Cause I freakin stayed up all night long just to talk to him about nothing. He's so freakin great its ridiculous. We have a couple things in common. Like being former twins that lost the sib at birth. (that was interesting) We aspire to be professional nerds. We're both crazy enough about each other to effin be e-tards and stay up all night long to chat. I helped him hook up his myspace profile so it wouldn't be plain. (Yes I am a freaking computer reject!) I think we're just infatuated with the fact that we're infatuated. Which is kewl. Cause I really don't mind at all adoring someone and being adored. At least we got the Aries/Leo combo working for us. Too bad/Lucky for me, he's in a different area code cause if I ever really met him in real life...I would probably pee my pants and run away. ;P

Click Here if ya want to be nosey.

The computer people at work are finally comming around to the realization that myspace is addicting. (I got a couple co-workers hooked..tee hee) Yeah. So I may get booted from that site soon. That'll suck big time cause then I'll actually be bored! I dunno. It's just crazy.

Other than my infatutation life is just peachy keen. Made my rent on time! (Sweet!) I actually have furniture. I need a T.V. but it keeps me reading cause I have so much frickin spare time. Currently reading Digital Fortress by Dan Brown. I effin love Dan Brown books. (If you haven't read Angels and Demons and/or DaVinci Code get on it!) They all rawk.

Besides all of that...

How y'all doing?

That's the state of the world today...

Dude I'm on an elevated alert

Go me.

Yeyness, DC is on elevated alert. Someone wants to put a bomb in my neighborhood. Nice. At first I was really frightened. I felt like someone just punched me in the lung and I lost my breath for a second. Then I came back to reality. While I does make me think...it really doesn't change anything does it. I mean it's always a possiblity and always will be a possibility that terrorist are going to bomb my little city. And that's what I accepted when I came back here to be with my family. Knowing and being close to my family everyday is worth more to me than being anywhere else in the world. Seeing my neice get taller and taking my nephew to Orioles games is fucking money in the bank. That's food for my soul. Being neighbors with my dad and sharing our stories together. Making eachother laugh. Just being close in general is worth more to me than anyone could ever give me. And I won't give that up. I love my family. And so I very happily choose to go on with life. Nothing will change for me. I just pray that god keep me.

In other news, Life is still grand and I'm taking things day by day. My new apt. is RAD to the bone. I love it. My family is healthy and happy. And everythang is alright. Right on.

I'm comming back to the light side (blogspot). Myspace is wearing me out. (But I love it!) I have the hugest infatuation with this almost 21 year old guy from NY. He is such an effin cutie! I love it. He's great and makes me smile the biggest cheesiest smiles. *le sigh*

Anyways, click below for some laughs. See y'all around. :)

Click here to know what it means to really bring the mosh!

Five things I'm greatful for today:

1. Costco and the crates of water.
2. My best friend getting a new car.
3. Maheo's blessings on me and my loved ones.
4. Free gum.
5. Money in the bank.

Rum and Monkey: The Name Generator Generator

My japanese name is 中村 Nakamura (center of the village) 歩 Ayumi (walk, deeper meaning: walk your own way).
Take your real japanese name generator! today!
Created with Rum and Monkey's Name Generator Generator.

As the time passes life moves forth...

These past couple days have been really weird for me. Fourth of July was fun but left a lot to be desired. Plus, it took a huge chunk of my bank account...*good times* During the days and times I'm not here on my blogger I've been spending them mostly on Myspace.com.

Now, despite what people may believe I do have a life. I'm just bored alot at work. I know in the past I have advocated greatly for Myspace but mainly because I like the connection...especially to those that don't have a blog or keep up with them. I like Myspace. I can be as retarded as I want to be and find more retards like me. Retards that like Star Trek TNG and like Hoobastank and Frank Sinatra at the same time. It's kewl like that. As I have expressed many times before this...It's teh awesome...

Back to the past couple of days...

So anyways, Tuesday I get back to my computer all siced for Myspace and I'm greeted with this email...

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Blush~*
Date: Jul 5, 2004 07:15 PM

Hello Spring....
I am sorry that i have to be the bearer of bad news.... I know that you knew my friend Evad....I just wanted to let you know that he passed away today... He cherished your friendship and it bought him great joy to meet you in this space..... Please say a prayer for him in hopes that his soul will find peace in heaven....

Blush~*
******************************************************

I was like what the fuck?!? That's crazy! I was just chatting with him the other day! We were talking about what we wanted to be when we grew up and how we were going to become teachers and mentors for under priviledged kids and live on the rez and make a difference. Dude, we even talked about meeting cause we were so close to each other. I trusted him alot. Whenever my "mom" and my niece passed away he was one of the first to console me and to send me positive thoughts. He was a great writer and musician. He was brilliant! He was beautiful and he was sincere. My virtual diamond in the ruff.

He was truely one of my "friends" that I actually considered a friend. And then all ov a sudden one day here and then next day...Gone. Gone. As in no more beats of his heart, no more dorky convos on the net. No more words of wisdom by Jeff Buckly. No more songs written for the women in his life. Just no more period. I haven't had someone just die on me hours after we conversed since my Grandpa n 92'. All of it was way too surreal for words. Having never met the guy I was very surprised to actually find myself sad and mourning this person. I was genuiely sad that he was gone and it scared me to think of and constantly be reminded that life is all too short. You never know if a simple jump in the lake will take your last breath. If even though it be a silly thought that you might actually die just like your idol... Just that morning before he had posted a picture of Marlon Brando and his last quote was so fortelling that it is embedded in my mind. "Death makes Angels of us all, and gives us wings..." To see that...and to have that be the last thing I see....????? There are no words or explanations for it. Everything about the way I knew him, the way he touched me and the way he died was so surreal.

Anyways, I suppose this beautifully concludes the string of threes in my life. My mom in May, My niece in June, and now a truely dear friend in July. ;0) I don't know whethere to be happy or sad at this point. I suppose a little of both. At any rate, I am in good spirits. I do shed tears from time to time but only cause these were all great people, who served a greater purpose than themselves and who I will always love, cherish, and remember.

REST IN PEACE...My GOOD FRIEND...MY LOVE...DAVID LAWS...

Your dash did mean something...

No, really, where have I been?

Man, it's been a while. Where have i been? Heck I dunno. Moving into my new place that's where....It's teh awesome!

*sigh* Can I just tell you how awesome it is to have my own place? It is awesome. Home is where the heart is and this is my home. *sigh* I need to put crap on the walls, a table or some furniture period would be good. But otherwise...it's all gravy. All on Friday! Yeah! I can't freakin wait!

Where the heck have I been?

create your own personalized map of the USA
or write about it on the open travel guide






create your personalized map of europe
or write about it on the open travel guide

Yeppers! 49 States, France, Germany, Switzerland and Austria. Not bad, eh?

If your bored...lemme know where yooou have been, eh?

Public adoration for the couple I <3 the most!

Congradulations, my loves. You guys made it! The first year is over and done with.

Numi, my little sister, I'm so proud of you for all that you've done thus far and all that you continue to do. You are an awesome Mom and couldn't have picked a better father for your children. Peter, I love you and even though I don't quite express it all the time. I wouldn't want any other brother in the whole wide world, not for a billion dollaz (maybe a trillion, Aye!). Plus, you are so much fun to pick on and razz. (you know you love it!)

You two have truely been an inspiration to me and watching the love you guys have for each other makes me wanna cry sometimes. (and actually makes me wanna barf on occasion) Seriously though, I don't know what I'd do without you two. The both of you. Well the four of you. You guys are the best because you have given me the most beautiful niece and craziest/funniest/dorkiest nephew I could ever possibly ask for. I know it hasn't always been easy for you guys but you sure do make it seem that way. You guys make it look fun.

So here's to the next year and many more after that. May the creator/Maheo/God continue to bless you both...

~*~Happy Anniversary, Kids!~*~

I love you guys!

When they first got engaged

What a freaky couple...

My beautiful nephew

My beautiful niece

me and my numi on her wedding day!


*If you would like to send out your well wishes please send them to Dangerous Angel by clicking here.

Mvto!

Spring aka Joigazm

Back to being the dork that is me.

Fuck, I'm a fucking dumbass. I had to...I was in a trance. It was an out of body experience. Like it wasn't even me....WTF? Yeah I'm a dork. And I love this movie for sentimental reasons...

You know that song "Breakfast at Tiffany's by Deep Blue Something....?

"And I said "What about Breakfast at Tiffany's?"
She said "I think I remember the film..."

If it said what about The Warriors...yeah that's totally my mom and dad. They used to watch that movie ova and over. I love it cause I love my parents. They're cute like that. (if you're confused again, yes my parents are divorced and are still best friends and are still so cute together)

Anyways...I went on to buy the movie/soundtrack/and they are making a game based on the film to come out in August. I'm like...pfffffffffffffffffffffffffft...WTF, kids!? It's so on....







If you would like to join in the dorkness that is moi...by all means...go to http://warriorsmovie.co.uk/

Thank you for the 5 seconds you'll never get back. :D

A beautiful day...

I took the day off today because I was really tired and drained. I needed the day off to refocus my energies and myself as well. I didn't really think twice this morning about calling in like I usually do. Today was just a day to sit at home and rest and conversate with my sister Roach.

We talked alot about our spiritualites and alot about the people we are. I mostly needed to get off my chest and focused on where I am now because of all this change in my life. I'm not afraid of it. Usually, I would be. With the death of my mom and the death of my daughther. I have a strong urge and need to one myself with everything in my life. My new apartment being somewhat at the forefront of it all. I'm finally moving out on my own. Into the real world. With a real job and a real space of my own. Not shared by roommates. Mine. For me, getting this apartment means so much and is a testiment to where I am in my life.

I've come so far from being that selfish/selfless little girl that was tied down to obligations in the family so much so that it hindered my wellbeing. People always felt a need to protect me and to baby me and take care of me and I in return felt obligated to take care of everyone's kids cause I was single and had no "real" obligations.

I'm finally comming into not having to rely or ask everyone to help me out with my life. (although that will never cease cause everyone needs a little help now and then) But the key word being rely. I'm finally comming into being able to trust myself and not judge myself so harshly for the person I was/am. I am who I am. I'm becomming more responsible and self-reliant by the day and that means so much to me and makes me proud of myself for comming so far.

I'm sure there will be challenges that will face me because I've made this declaration of myself but it's only a test to see how badly I do want this. After I get through this, the next challenge will be school cause that's the only thing I've been really shifty about. I've let all my opportunties go to hell and now I'm at the bottom for that. (My GPA is lower than anyone wants to acknowledge)

Anyway that's neither here nor there.

I am where I am which is where I am suppose to be. I have my friends that I learn so much from in the day to day. And I love them all. I tend to attract turtle people in my life. Everyone one of my friends in my immediate circle that I cherish daily are turtle people. I think that's kewl. (Turtle people are the burden bearers, spiritualist and connectors to the earth)

Blah blah blah. So that's where my day is.

Talking with Roch about all this made me feel peaceful and at one with all that's going on around me. So today is a great day. I would get all NDN and say "Today is a good day to die" but I'm not ready yet. It is but is soo not my time to go. There is so much on this earth I was meant to accomplish that when it's fianally all over, I know I will have live a fullfilled life and have no regrets. My journey here has only just begun and I am at one.

In the arms of the angels you fly....

Today started as anyother day. But from the beginning I new it was a different one. Today is the celebration of my mothers life. The day she was born. Like any great daughter I forgot. *typical* I had decided to wait and call her later during lunch so I put it off til then. Then around 12 I started to feel very tired and weary. I took my lunch but tired to sleep but it was no use. I was restless and as soon as I closed my eyes it seemed I started having a chaotic dream. One where the world was literally turned upside down. Even asleep I wasn't asleep. I just watched the everyone and tried to hold on and be strong. When I came back to my desk I got another one of those phone calls. The same phone call like had recieved only the week before.

As in alot of other cultures, when children are born in a family everyone is family. Cousins are new mothers and fathers. Aunts are also new grandparents. When your cousins have children they are also your children. My cousins whom I grew up with are my brothers and sisters. The closest one being my cousin Rachael who is onlly 3 months younger than I and also my cousin Ryan who is 4 years younger. They are my siblings and I love them as dearly as I love my biological brothers and sister.

My numi, Kelli called me and when she was finally able to eek it out I could hardly breath. One of my little ones was gone. Our little Ashlyn had passed away. Today was the day she had decided to take her journey. It was finally her time to move on from this life.

I have been there for everyone of my nieces and nephews births. I was there the first day she was born. When Ashlyn was born it was an exciting event as they all are. I remember being in the hospital and everyone being so excited. The brand new Aunties and Uncles and my Aunt being the most excited of all. When Ash was born she was so beautiful. I cried cause I'm a sap for the miricle of life. She didn't cry very much but when she did it was so cute cause it was just this sweet little wail. She was the first female grandchild. The new ndn princess was born. :D

The next day, we got some intersting news. It seemed our Ashlyn was special in more ways then one. She had been born with an extra chromizome. A condition called Trisomy 18. A condition that hardly ever goes to term but comming from the strong family that she does, she did. When Trisomy babies are born they are given a life expectancy of 2 weeks to 3 months. Anything pasted that is a miricle and of course not unheard of. Ashlyn was strong and she gave us amazing joy for four years. To me there is nothing more amazing in my life than that. She was truely a blessing and blessed each and everyone of us. She was always happy. She always had a smile. She had her fathers eyes and her mothers eyelashes. I always remember her most for her little dances that she loved to do. That little chick loved to shake her booty! She loved music. And she was loved very much by everyone who knew her.

~*~Ashlyn Rose Wallace~*~
~*~December 4, 1999 ~ June 14, 2004~*~

My little one I love you.

Thank you for being in our lives and choosing us as a family.

In your four short years, you taught us what it is to be happy everyday.

How to smile everyday cause life is short.

I will grieve for you cause I miss you.

Cause you were so strong and so silly & happy.

But I will also be joyous for you are now once again whole & without pain.

You will never beforgotten.

Our Angel in life.

Now our Angel forever.

Take care my love.

On to the creator you fly.

Here are some pics I took this morning...







Nancy

Yeah it was raining the whole time. But I got some good black and white from Paco's camera. We'll see how it turns out.

Anyways, (singing) I got my apt. I got my apt. (/singing) And i get to move in next week. How far am I moving? Straight down the hall. Am I excited? Hell yes. Finally, a place all to myself. No curfew, no one to bother, and most importantly, no one to bother me! Yey!

Have a great weekend Dudes, Kittens and bambinos.

Ciao.

Randum Thoz...

I don't know what I'm thinking or what the hell I'm feeling. I'm tired. I'm in a silly mood. Too much to think about.
________________________________

Some would consider themselve lucky to live where I live. Ronald Regan is having his stay here in our nations capital for the next few days. It opens up at 9 to the public. I don't know if I wanna go. I should go. I mean not many people are afforded this opportunity. I live literally less than a mile a way. I should. But I don't feel like it. Not right now anyway.
________________________________

I need to clean my room so badly it sux. I have too many clothes. Still trying my hardest to simplify. there are just too many old letters/trinkets/etc. to let go of. Who keeps porcelin N'Sync bobblehead dolls that are still in the box that I bought at the dollar store as a joke really?

________________________________

Oh yeah...I ran in to an old aqaintence a couple days ago. A The french guy that I dated on and off for about 3 months and dropped like a bad habit last year. No goodbye. No returned calls. Nada. He saw me on the street and recognized me. He was like "Spring! How you been? How es everything?" I was like fine and all the while thinking to myself. shitfuckfuckfuckshitfuckshit. I didn't know what to do. It was really awkward. Especially since he was being so nice to me. I was like wtf? Yeah that'll happen a couple more times cause now he's for sure going to blow up my phone. What a fucking retard.

________________________________

Lord help me. I need to finallly get back to my website and fix it up all purdy like. It's been down forever. I'm just a lazy ass with dial up and no creative thought.

Forget that...I'm creative. Just lazy.

Someday I'll stop.

________________________________

Yeah...I have more and they'll come when they come. As for now. I will go.

Ciao, Bailas.

Updated music list for 06/07/04-06/13/-04

The Scientist - Coldplay
You Get what you give - New Radicals
Crucifixion - Alex Bach
Breakdown Here - Julie Roberts
Float On - Modest Mouse <---actual download right click.

For Mom:

*Disclaimer: In case you are wondering and not that it matters but my dad is gay. I'm just letting you know, in case you didn't, so you're not confused*

This is a dedication to my fathers ex-boyfriend that for a while was apart of the family. I recently got the news he has since passed and this is for him as well as me. Thank you. ;)

I know you can hear me

Yesterday while I was cleaning, I found some old cards of mine that I kept over the years and was contemplating throwing them out. The first one I saw happened to be from you and my dad after I graduated from my Life training class, saying you were proud of me. The other was from Christmas time wishing me well and missing me. Seeing them made me remember what I had heard a only two days before. That when tears began to fall. You had lived out your happy life and had fulfilled your life's purpose. You were on to your next journey.

I remember when I first heard the news I was shocked. Then quickly put on my brave face/voice for my father cause I know he had been crying so much already. It pained him to say the words that you were gone. But I listened. No exactly knowing what to say or how to feel. Then I immediately thought of my sister, knowing she was closest to you of all of us right then. And I knew she needed me now as much as ever. When she answered she didn't have to speak nor did I. I just listened to her weeps and tears. Still not knowing what to say. Still holding back my own grief and sorrow. Unwilling to let myself be sad. Finally, when I let her go, I looked to my right and saw the Chinese Calligraphy you got for me in my names from China. Both in Kate and Katie cause they didn't have Spring. Right then I couldn't help but let it out. Right then, I let myself cry.

I haven't cried much since then, although I'm crying right now. Cause I miss you more than I ever realized. I never knew it would hurt this much. It does. It hurts cause I did love you and I really do care. I was just too selfish and stubborn like my father to show it. We didn't even say goodbye when you two broke up. We just let it wander and drift away like a raft out to sea. Which seemed to be fine for the both of us.

I don't do regrets. So I'm not going to regret anything I did or didn't do. I just miss you now. And it hurts that you are gone. I know you are watching over all of us. And even though not in the physical, you will watch Amba and Tris grow up. Whenever I am faced with a tough choice like fighting for the better job, more money or doing something that makes me happy. I'll think of you and what you would tell me. "Don't settle. Life is too short to settle, Miss Spring"

You never settled. You spent your money on the best of everything cause that's what you knew you deserved. You are an inspiration of why you should live life to the fullest. I think that's what I'll remember most.

I only wish to live at least have half the life you lived. And see a third of the places you have been. I'm still young so I think I can make it happen. Forget that. I will make it happen. ;) So in lieu of regrets I will do rememberences. And keep the good memories with me.

I remeber the first time we met...
How shy you were at meeting me. And we went to Bucca's for dinner. It was my Dad's birthday. You were quiet yet still managed to smile. I'm glad you were there. It was a fun night.

I remember the first time I knew you were a part of my family...
My father, You, my Numi and me all went to go see The Divine Secrets of the Yah Yah Sisterhood. My sister called you mom by accident but it fit. And you were stuck with it. Soccer Mom. *LOL* We had a great time that night.

I remember that...
You never left me out. But we were never that close cause we're stubborn. I knew you loved me and I loved you. We had good times.

I remember when you...
Let me drive your mercedes when you first got it. Dad about had a heart attack but you let me take it around the block with the top down. I was pimp for 5 minutes. It was awesome.

I remember when we...
Had a blast at Kelli's wedding. You were so helpful and made everything possible. Kelli had the best wedding that anyone one of us could have hoped for. And it would have never happened because of you. You got to meet my real mom and you too seemed to get along just fine. I'm happy she dragged you with them when they did the parent introductions. You deserved to be there just as much as my father and real mom. You were "mom".

I'm most remember you for...
Being an example of what it takes to get what you want out of life and how to be a success. You lossed all the weight. You became a independantly wealthy with your own business. And you finally got the mercedes you dreamed of your whole life. You suceeded and thrived. You made your life happen and lived your life to the fullest to the very end. I'm glad you were apart of my life.

~*~R.I.P. Micheal "Mom" Davis~*~

What do I always do when I lack creativity...

Give you the survey's! yey!


? · I N F O R M A T I O N · ? ·
Name: Spring
Single or taken: Single for life! (OMG hope not!)
Sex: Female
Birthday: March 26
Sign: Aries baby, yeah!
Siblings: 4 Brahs and 1 numi(lil sis)
Hair color: reddish light brown
Eye color: Brown
Height: 5'8"

· ? · F A S H I O N | S T U F F · ? ·
Where is your favorite place to shop: H&M/Old Navy
Any tattoos or piercings: Lip *old* getting redone.

· ? · S P E C I F I C S · ? ·
Do you do drugs?: nicotine and alcohol
What kind of shampoo do you use?: Garnier Nutrisse or Citre' Shine
What are you most scared of?: The Dark
What are you listening to right now? Some Swell.Chemistry
Who is the last person that called you?: Shelly
Where do you want to get married?: Um...Mountains in Idaho
How many buddies are online right now?: on yahoo 8
What would you change about yourself?: My flabby arms.

· ? · F A V O R I T E S · ? ·
Color: blue and purple (buises!)
Food: YOu know it teh frybret
Boys names: Ayo (my clan)/Aiden
Girls names: Jaden <---to be changed...
Subjects in school: Science, yo!
Animals: Loja's (turtles)

· ? · H A V E | Y O U | E V E R · ? ·
Given anyone a bath? Yup.
Smoked?: Yup
Bungee jumped?: Not yet
Made yourself throw up?: nope
Skinny dipped?: a trillion times
Ever been in love?: 3 times but the 1st one is debatable
Made yourself cry to get out of trouble? Heck yeah
Pictured your crush naked?: Oh yeah
Cried when someone died?: Of course
Lied: Of course
Fallen for your best friend?: We'll he's my bf now.
Been rejected?: Nope
Rejected someone?: Unfortunately
Used someone?: I'm an Aries
Done something you regret?: Not really.

· ? · C U R R E N T · ? ·
Clothes: Pink sweater/striped blouse, long black skirt, loafers.
Music: Incubus
Make-up: M.A.C. baby but mostly covergirl
Annoyance: HATERS!
Smell: The icebox
Desktop picture: My grandparents during HS in love
Book you're reading: Just finished Angels and Demons by Dan Brown <---trippy
CD in player: Mixtape from Lisa
DVD in player: Pretty in Pink

· ? · L A S T | P E R S O N · ? ·
Hugged: Benji
You imed: Wally from Swell.Chemistry
You yelled at: Benji
You kissed: My niece Amba

· ? · A R E | Y O U · ? ·
Understanding: Y
Open-minded: Y
Arrogant: Y
Insecure: Y
Random: I don't know am I?
Hungry: Niet
Smart: More like intelligent
Moody: Yep
Hard working: Hardly
Organized: No way
Healthy: to to be
Shy: for the first 5 minutes
Difficult: when we've hung out for 8 years yeah
Attractive: Hell Yeah!
Bored easily: Too easily
Responsible: i try ha ha
Obsessed: Niet
Angry: Not at the moment
Sad: kinda
Happy: For the most part
Hyper: Only around other goofies
Trusting: too easily

· ? · W H O | D O | Y O U | W A N N A · ? ·
Kill?: No one
Slap: People who don't slap me comments! Jokes.
Get really wasted with?: Pebbles...that would be funny!
Get high with: Ha ha...I know it'll NEVER happen but Pebbles again. *just say no kids*
Talk to offline: Amba cause she's kewl as haites!
Talk to online: Brian cause he's funny as hell
Sex it up with: Micheal Greyeyes in Dance Me Outside/Selma Hayek *rowr*

· ? · R A N D O M · ? ·
In the morning I am: Cleaning my room/excercising/internet
Love is: Giving up your last piece of licorice.
Sexual preference: Trisexual/Metrosexual ha ha
What do you notice first in the sex you're into: How they started the conversation off.

· ? · W H I C H | I S | B E T T E R · ? ·
Coke or Pepsi: Coke
Flowers or candy: Flowers/Iris'.
Tall or short: Tall

· ? · D O | Y O U | E V E R · ? ·
Sit on the internet all night waiting for that someone special to im you?: Paco once.
Save conversations: When there good
Wish you were a member of the opposite sex?: Sometimes.
Wish you were younger: 17 maybe
Cry because someone said something to you?: I'm a drama queen. Sue me.

· ? · N U M B E R · ? ·
Of guys I've kissed: about 27?
Of girls I've kissed: 5
Of CD's I own: 253.
Of scars on my body: 6.
Of things that I regret: Nothing

· ? · Y O U R | T H O U G H T S · ? ·
I know: I am a crazy dorkwad.
I want: hot secks.
I have: a great haircut.
I wish: I won the lottery.
I hate: Haters...lol!
I fear: the Dark and being a disappointment
I hear: Nirvana calling.
I search: my room for my stupid IHS badge!
I wonder: When I'll wake up from this dream called life.

Don't pee on my leg...

And tell me it's raining.

I don't need it.

Ha ha. This weekend was a looong one! I can't believe it. I'm very very glad that it's only a four day week.

How many of you remembered your moment of silence @ 3 est? I didn't I forgot. But then again I was watching a movie and was quiet so does that count? :)

Friday was crazy as usual. Drunk times. No Drama. Saturday...just hanging out and playing some pool and darts with friends. Sunday, Lounging around/watched Lord of the Rings "Return of the King" for the millionth time. (That movie always gets to me.) Monday. Just hung out with my sister. She's goopy.

Nothing too exciting. Cept, I may be getting my own apartment next month. IN the same building no less! No more living with my father. And no having to live with roomates. And I don't have to leave the neighborhood I've come to love and adore! It's great! I love it. Pray for me that it works out guys!

Moving on...

I've come to the realization that I need to do an incredible amout of simplifying. I have to much junk and clutter. I'm a pack rat and a junk junkie. O hord all kinds of inane objects in the hope of holding on to some distant memories past. Old movie stubs, plane tickets, N'sync bobblehead dolls, my beanie baby collection in a box, Clothes that I convice myself I will wear when I am "skinny". Tons upon Tons of crap. Just laying on my room. Cause I'm lazy. I'm a lazy woman. Tonight my goal is to start simplifying. Clutter doesn't define me or make me who I am. Trinkets don't hold all the love a person has for me just cause I possess it. I am a willing and able person to do this...I deserves this. God knows I deserve a simple happy carefree so I can find my damn keys in the morning without shaking down the place life. Let's see how much I think I really do deserve this. My goal is to have it done by the end of the week.

Ciao Bailas,

Updated music list for the week.

Southern Girl - Incubus
Video - India Arie
That would be her - Joe Nichols
Cry Me a River - Swell.Chemistry
Love is a battlefield - Pat Benatar

I'm feeling loving today...

I'm feeling rather lovely this morning. And I guess I would like to take the time to acknowledge all my blog dawgz that have been down and around for me. You guys are awesome and I truely enjoy reading all y'allz thoughts and feelings because we all feel that way sometimes and it's good to share the good and the bad. It's been an experience and sometimes you guys just crack me up when I'm totally upset.

I'm just letting you know I appriciate each and everyone of you past and present.

Pebbles, Carm, Chris, Danna, Sonya, Kathy, J*me, Native Cupcake, Dave, Sherry, M*ss Amba....EVERYONE for jeebus sake (so many to mention)
*especially Chris whose been down since I was http://www.geocities.com/ndnsweetheart_1999 AKA http://thefrybreadzone.com*

You guys rawk. I heart you all.

Late.

You are Everything To Somebody

Right now at this very minute-----------

someone is very proud of you someone is thinking of you
someone cares about you
someone misses you
someone wants to talk to you
someone wants to be with you
someone hopes you aren't in trouble
someone is thankful for the support you have provided
someone wants to hold your hand
someone hopes everything turns out all right
someone wants you to be happy
someone wants you to find them
someone is celebrating your successes
someone wants to give you a gift
someone thinks you ARE a gift
someone hopes you are not too cold, or too hot
someone wants to hug you
someone loves you
someone wants to lavish you with small gifts
someone admires your strength
someone is thinking of you and smiling
someone wants to be your shoulder to cry on
someone wants to go out with you and have a lot of fun
someone thinks the world of you
someone wants to protect you
someone would do anything for you
someone wants to be forgiven
someone is grateful for your forgiveness
someone wants to laugh with you about old times
someone remembers you and wishes you were there
someone is praising God for you
someone needs to know that your love is unconditional
someone values your advice
someone wants to tell you how much they care
someone wants to stay up watching old movies with you
someone wants to share their dreams with you
someone wants to hold you in their arms
someone wants YOU to hold them in your arms
someone treasures your spirit
someone wishes they could STOP time because of you
someone praises God for your friendship and love
someone can't wait to see you
someone wishes that things didn't have to change
someone loves you for who you are
someone loves the way you make them feel
someone wants to be with you
someone is hoping they can grow old with you
someone hears a song that reminds them of you
someone wants you to know they are there for you
someone is glad that you're their friend
someone wants to be your friend
someone stayed up all night thinking about you
someone is alive because of you
someone is remorseful after losing your friendship
someone is wishing that you would notice them
someone wants to get to know you better
someone believes that you are their soul mate
someone wants to be near you
someone misses your guidance and advice
someone values your guidance and advice
someone has faith in you
someone trusts you
someone needs you to send them this letter
someone needs your support
someone needs you to have faith in them
someone needs you to let them be your friend
someone will cry when they read this

No more long sexy hair...

I just chopped all my freakin hair off and I love it!

I decided this morning and did it this afternoon. It's gone. It's all gone.





Yeah! I love it love it love it

Ciao Baila's...

BOREDUM: Firsts and Lasts...

I haven't done one of these in a while...



FIRSTS
------------
First real memory of something: Being in the living room of my first house christmas morning. It was morning light and dusky the whole room was brown and I was so happy I got a rocking chair with a special cushion just for me. I was prolly 3.

First car: The first car that I bought was an Mitsubishi Mirage hatchback. Red. It was old cute and all mine.

First date: Burger King, spitwad fight and a movie.

First kiss: My first love. It was our first night out as a couple (we'd been friends for a while) and he kissed me as soon as he saw me. Aaaaah he had the best lips in the world.

First break-up: Same guy, I couldn't believe it hurt so bad.

First job: Summer intern @ DHHS/IHS

First screen name: shyone17

First self purchased album: MTV Party to Go: Vol. 1

First piercing/tattoo: well my mom pierced my ears when I was 8 months but I got my lip peirced when I was 21.

First enemy: Stephanie Smith. I didn't like her at all when I first met her. But eventually we became and still are best friends.

First play/musical/performance: Christmas Play with Carebears in it...I was funshine bear...go figure.

First music you remember hearing in your house: Country. My momma was a Reba Mc Intyre/Judds (sp?) fan.

LASTS
-------------

last movie seen: Van Helsing...okay to miss. watch if your bored and hard up

last book read: Angels and Demons by Dan Brown. (Fucking awesome and so much better than Da Vinci Code)

last crush: Since I'm going to say internet crushes don't count....(My ex-bf Mr. Man...)

last kiss: An Hour ago...my nephew Tris

last time felt loved: 5 seconds ago...my best friend Roacha called.

last phone call: Ha ha Roacha

last tv show watched: Real World/Road Rules Challenge

last time showered: Yesterday.

last shoes worn: My black 4 inch heels. (they're so cute!)

last item bought: My sister and my nephew's lunch

last annoyance: Tris kept trying to wipe his tomato hands on my new white linen skirt.

last disappointment: Road Rules won.

last ice cream eaten: James bought me an ice cream after hfstival.

last time in love: Ha ha...fall of 2001...Ryan.

last time hugged: My Roacha last night.

last shirt worn: black fitted tee with "This is what a feminist looks like." on the front

Ugh!

I hate today...I hate today...I hate today...

I finally had a good fucking post about something thoughtful...

*myspace crushes* lol. And my computer (well really me cause I think I'm a know it all) effed it up. Now I'm just pissed. I'll repost later. :(

Oh yeah, I love concerts...HFStival...

Man, Saturday was off the fucking hook, man.

99.1 HFStival Line-up

Main Stage:
11:15 VooDoo Blue
12:05 O.A.R.
01:00 Yellowcard
01:50 Lostprophets
02:50 Papa Roach
03:40 Cypress Hill
04:30 Violet Femmes
05:30 New Found Glory
06:30 P.O.D.
07:35 Jay-Z
08:35 The Offspring
09:45 The Cure

Street Stage:

12:00 Taking Back Sunday
12:45 Fall Out Boy
01:35 The Living End
02:25 Lit
03:20 The Yeah Yeah Yeahs
4:20 Modest Mouse

Since I'm such a lazy ass and James takes forever to look good the world we got to HFS late. No matter. We got there just in time for a quick bite to eat, a drink, and on to Papa Roach. Papa Roach Blazed it and it was so much fun. They played a couple new songs are kicked ass. And I got introduced to my first fuckin mosh of the day. *scrape*




After that we decided to skip Cypress Hill and went to find some cool shade and some water. (The sun makes me thirsty) We found some shade and went on to listen to the last of the Yeah Yeah Yeah whiles sitting under a tree and eating on some Nachos. (Oh why do I love jalepeno's sooo...must be the little mexican in me) We lounged around somemore for Modest Mouse and subsequently missed out on Violent femmes. Which was okay for me cause it was so freakin hot outside. I was just happy to be in the shade. Finally, after we got our bearings *:-)* We went in search of our next beer. We just happend to find it in the Area (How did we miss it the first time?) and posted up for a second waiting for P.O.D.



As soon as we were finished with that first one though they closed. *pffft* Bummer!

Oh well, P.O.D. Was up next and we moshed our way to the front before it started.




I got to get a pic of the back of Sonny's head when he was in the crowd....*nice*




Anyways, after those pics we had to get out of the crowds and manged to get through one of the biggest fucking mosh pits there unharmed. (It was scurry!) We chilled there letting our legs rest before we had to Fight all the bitches to see Jay-Z. (James' baby daddy)




As you can see I got a couple good pictures...but again...fighting the crowd proved a little too much for my James and we blazed the fuck out. (My legs were tired anyways) We went up to the top of the bleachers and posted there...Relieved to finally be sitting! I was kinda sad that we didn't get to mosh for the offspring but they were still tight as hell! They were fucking awesome and I am a very renewed fan! Man, I can't tell you how much I enjoyed their set. Ugh, you just had to be there.




Anyways, last but not the least by any means was the cure.




Man, I am so glad I went cause the cure was totally worth it. I love Lulluby. It's the perfect creepy gothy quality that I love. They also played pictures of you and alot of other greatest hits. I'll mos defly have to see them when they come back to play the 9:30. Hell yeah. Great fucking times. And yes, James, we are so fucking on for next year. I can't wait.

Where did you week go?

I don't care where mine went...I'm just glad it's freaking Friday! Thank god. Plus, it's Payday! And I all my back bounuses... Great. Too bad I had 3 stupid over drafts. So I didn't get to enjoy any of it. ;(

Oh well that's the way my life is. It's my own damn fault. Either I can crap on myself about it now or be thankful I finally technically got a full paycheck. (The latter sounds better don't you think?) Yeah. I finally got a full paycheck. Yay! lol

Anyways, Ryan asked me to go to Red Earth with him. I know it makes his parents sad cause they wanted me to go to the Ala-Cou pow-wow but I dont' see that happening. Roacha's friend M is going to that one and I can just feel all the drama stemming from that. Tha girl is really nice and really sweet and everything. She means totally well. but...She's never grew up on the rez. She don't know what it's like or has the first clue. Plus, she thinks she's really hot and cute shit and doesn't care if she steps on toes. That's going to be an interesting one. For Roach having to deal with her and me. I know I could take care of myself. I know how girls are when they think you're trying to "take" the good men off their rez. Even if they don't like em. Don't be tryin to take what don't belong to you. lol.

Blah blah blah, I wanna gossip more but I'll stop. It's just not the best of situations. I hope it works out for them.

As for me, I'll be snaggin @ good old Red Earth. With My BEST FRIEND Ryanna! Yeah. I get to see Ryanna again! I miss that fool. I miss the chess and the wrestling. I miss his awesomeness. It'll be good to see himz. And I just heard that my girl James is going to Red Earth too. Hell fuckin yeah. It's going to be on til the break of dawn. I just hope I don't run into any "old" boyfriends. Well really there is only one and I sure as hell don't want to run into that fool. :( Blah.

Man I'm rambling.

I'll go for now.

Updated song list for the week:

1. I know you want me - Nastyboy Klick
2. Tainted - My Ruin *I <3 this*
3. Diary - Alicia Keys
4. What happened - Gretchen Wilson
5. On a High - Duncan Sheik

Angels and Demons...

Man, I finally just finished reading Angels and Demons by Dan Brown, author of the Da Vinci Code. Man, that book was definately unputdownable! It was exciting from beginning to end. I think what I loved the most about it is that most of his fiction is based on real historical facts and even some current facts that many people aren't aware of. For example did you ever wonder where we ever got the pyramid thing on the back of the dollar bill from? Or what it has to do with American history? The truth is that it has absolutely nothing to do with American history but has strong historical ties to an ancient group called the illuminati.

From his website http://www.danbrown.com:
Many historians now credit the unseen hand of the Illuminati with influencing the design of the Great Seal. The Illuminati had infiltrated the brotherhood of the Masons at a time when the Masons were very influential in U.S. politics (Vice President Henry Wallace was an upper echelon Mason.) Most believe the Illuminati used their considerable influence to "brand" their symbology on the dollar bill.

The "all-seeing eye" above the pyramid is a well-known Illuminati symbol called the Shining Delta. The eye signifies the Illuminati's "all-seeing" infiltration of government and community. The triangle (or delta) around the eye is the mathematical symbol for change (the Illuminati's ultimate goal was to bring about massive change in the form of a secular New World Order.) And finally, the rays of light shining off the triangle signify enlightenment and illumination (i.e., intellectual freedom from the dangerous "myth" of religion.)

kewl huh?>

Anyways...Click here to listen to Tristan's Cicada song! (or right click and save as) It's soo cute!

Just breathe...

Being an Aries sux sometimes. (Well not really but sometimes its just really confusing) I love being an Aries. I love everything about being an Aries. The immaturity, the jealousy, the stubborness, the attitude. I'm a very big closet romantic. I wanna be swept off my feet. (But the draw back to that is that I hate not being in the loop! So surprises...sowie. I dunno. I love that I feel comfortable saying whatever the fuck is on my mind. And I love being #1. Cause I don't care if anyone thinks I'm not #1. I know I am. I'm the G.O.A.T. I am the greatest Spring Sunshine Fixico of all time. And ain't anyone gonna fade this. I know I am beautiful. I know I'm intelligent. I'm a fucking rock star. And you can try to bring me down but it only brings me back up more to know that if your hatin on me...you're just making me the center of your world for a while. And that's fine by me. Anyways. I really didn't have anything else to write about so that's what you got.

Cioa, Bailas...It's Wednesday.

A little poem if you will...

Um...you dropped something.

My head races as my heart screams.
My head melts as my eyes wander.
Lost and confused yet so annoyed.
Wondering when and what, why.
Staying stationary hoping for sense to come back.
I lost a lot I admit to myself.

I have not had nor wanted this thing for a while.
But somehow you have unknowingly left it here.
As if you dropped it on accident.
Not meaning to.
I hold it close wondering if I should give it back.
For what use is it to me?

What good is it to keep such a thing.
It weighs on me like I haven’t felt in...
It weighs me down and tugs me backward.
I can’t seem to get up.
I can’t seem to make it let go.
I can’t breathe.

It seems trivial to have such a thing.
Simple yet wrought with meaning and complications
I shouldn’t keep this
It wasn’t meant for me.
It was surely placed here by accident.
I have no choice but to return it before anyone notices.

I shouldn’t be seen with it.
So, I’ll just put in my sock drawer like a keepsake
Of what may have been
Had I known I had the courage then.
I now have not the courage to regret.
So I'll leave it there til perchance I see you again.

Meet my nephew Tristan...

Yes I changed my blog again. I found this awesome picture of my nephew Tristan and knew I had to make it a blog picture. It's perfect. This picture totally remindes me to not take life seriously. Life is too serious to take seriously, as my father always says. And I am 100% behind that statement.

Lucky Me...

I met this chick Claudia last night and she was fine as hell. She was really super nice. I know I look on the tramp side. But it was my ghey lover's birthday and he likes it when I dress slutty. (What's up with ghey men and boobs!) lol. Anyways it was a great night all in all. Her boi wasn't half bad either (actually he was fine as hell). I talked to him about losing my access fat cause he just lost 200 lbs. I was like damn. He's hot. I wish I remembered his name. *fans herself* They both walked me home. *LUCKY!*


*Bad picture of him*

Lovely Day....

It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood.
A beautiful day for a neighbor.
Would you be mine.
Could you be mine.
Won't you be...my neighbor?

5 months later....

That's right I said 5 months later. I am finally strong enough and brave enough to boldly go where no other man nor woman had gone before. Yes that's right folks. I am finally doing my freakin laundry. I know I say that alot. but as we speak the soap is doing it's job and all my clothes are sorted. The battle has begun. Who will win? No one can say for sure. I will swing my sword of determination and use my shield of magic soap to conquer all that come against me. For I, Spring, shall be victorious. Yes...I am going to win.

"Die, Dirty Laundry, Die!"

Yo! I met Vince Vaughn!

I had the fucking time of my life last night.

I didn't expect to anything last night. I didn't even expect to go out. Roacha decided to take pity on my poor soul and took me out. It was kewl. We went to Big Hunt cause we were too lazy to figure out someother place to go. So we waited for her friend Julius (who has the best Native humor ever!) to get off the metro and then went. It was great. We had a couple rounds and then Julius had to go home. But not before Benji showed up. So another couple rounds and then someone just rudely bumps into me. And when I turn around there he was. The awesome and very tall Vince Vaughn.




Vince in his hay.




Thank god for digital cameras!


Benji and Owen


Anyways. I took this picture and then continued to be star struck. I absolutely love Vince Vaughn. I loved him Clay Pigeons and Psycho. I dunno. Just something about him.

Anyways, miscellaneous.



Benji and me.



Roacha



Anyways Happy belated Cinco de Mayo.

It's Wacky Wild Wednesday!

Muahahahaha!

Today my nephew's pre-k class had wacky wild Wednesday. Where obviously you dress Wacky and Wild. Never to be outdone my nephew wore Fuzzy Blue Alien Antennae, his dad's old tie around his head. An oxford with sock arm gloves and two tanks. sponge bob pajama bottoms with boxers over them. and his bear claw slippers. It's was this shizznit. His mom asked him if he wanted to wear his sunglasses too and he goes *puts his little hand up* *serious* "Mom, that's a little too much".

I Heart my nephew!

Needless to say either the others didn't dress up or the best they could come up with is just wearing plain pj's. One kid even went as far as wearing underwear on his head. (now that's a litte too much) I picture soon.

On another note....

Are any of y'all comming out for the "big" pow-wow in September conmemorating the NMAI Grand Opening Ceremony?

You have to. That's joint is sure to be mad crazy with Natives from all over! Native Celebs. (C'mon you know Adam Beach is going to be there, lol) Vendors. The whole sha-bang.

So come guys...I'm asking you. Begging you!

Even if you are iffy right now fill this out so you can be in one of the biggest grand entries possibly ever. Click here now!

Anyways, That's all I have to say about that. DC y'all. Bring your families. Bring your snaggin blanket it and lawn chairs!

Now why don't she write

I hardly ever find the time to just lay down thoughts ya know. Lay down these little thought fishies in my head. It's Cinco de Mayo and I have 20 bucks to my name. I suppose I'll save it for tomorrow so I can get piss drunk with Benji and win all the "Friends" trivia prizes cause I can. lmao. Yeeah. I have my other blogger outside this. I post most of my thoughts there. There are times, though, that I can't really say want I want cause alot of Natives (Americans) are so conservative. Not all of them. Not like I really care. If I really wanna say something I will. But once I have to second guess myself it seems pointless. I don't ever talk about being Two-Spirited. Or what it means to me. I wouldn't even know where to begin there. Not that it's a big deal. They know. I just don't make it a big deal. I dunno why I don't. Some of its like I don't wanna make a "official statement" like I felt compelled to or something. "Just so they're is no confusion I like pussy, too. Any questions? Good." That's just seems silly. And totally un necessary. I guess maybe it's just that my dad reads my blogger. Sometimes. And we haven't really talked about me being two-spirited. Although he knows as well. He's Two-Spirited too and the greatest guy I know. I fluctuate from I can tell him anything to sweating the petty shit cause he's my dad. Sweating the un necessary non-sense. It's like the baby white elephant in the middle of the room that's not bothering anyone so don't talk about it. Shh. If anything I should talk to him more about this. But alas....*whatever* If you don't know what two-spirited is its when your born a certain gender but with the soul of the other. Kinda like reincarnation with a twist. In my culture and many other Native cultures two-spirits were the leaders and the shaman. The healers and guiders. I was born into a strong family and I was born a two-spirit. I suppose you could sum up two-spirit as a person who is ghey but they are so much more than that and they are not all completely ghey. Take me for instance. I'm not just drawn to women. I tend to fall for really androgynous guys too. Kinda like the boy soul I have is gay. lol But I suppose that's just from being an Aries as well. My girl Lisa sent me this a while back about Aries lesbians... "Aries is obsessed with the bathroom. She loves public toilets as much as gay men do! In her heart, she is a bit of a gay man. You may feel her pushing you to parts unknown before you've even gotten to second base. That's part of her charm. Beneath her hot, womanly body, she's just a teenage boy with a hard-on." Yeah that me. ha ha ha...too funny. There is more to that but I'll post it later. Anyways. That about sums it up for me I suppose. Perhaps someday I'll get to have the chat with the old man. But for now I'll just keep the on having the fun with my girl James & Liquid Ladies and if Lisa ever gets her freakin internship, my midge. *sidebar* James was talking to this hawt chick that looked like Paris Hilton. It's was some funny stuff. She was pretty but he friend was less conceited and cuter.

Anyways...I'll guess I'll end for now. Brain dried up.

Am I wrong?

Official Eddie Spears Website

I was just wondering if I'm wrong for wanting to buy a Dreamkeeper poster hand signed by Eddie Spears himself. Eddie gives me naughty thoughts...

I just feel like it's groupy/teenagyish...

but then again besides being hot I like the movie...



I dunno...I'm so confused.

I got this from...

I got this from Sherry. I hardly ever resist a good quiz.

BILL! (Snake Charmer)



You're Bill! I love you! Anyways, you're skilled in the art of manipulation. You're very strong, talented, powerful, and witty. You don't seem to have any real sense of morality, and you only let your kindness show around a select handful of people (mostly Kiddo and B.B). You do have some regret for the horrible things you've done, but won't let it interefere with your life. You respect your opponents, and you generally believe in fair game.

Kill Bill: Which Deadly Viper Assassin Are You? (Vol. II spoilers... results with pics)