One day its here...next day its gone. Well I suppose I'll enjoy it for now. Lately at work when I have nothing to preoccupy myself, I've been hanging around CurvyChick.com. Its not bad. Its like myspace for the plus-size diva. The good thing about it is I only have to be myself around them...the bad thing about it is some of the ladies are a little too big for their britches...metaphorically speaking of course. I'm sure that's just women in general but some women just tick me off with their self-loathing and bitching about things that are trivial. I know I bitch about things that in the grand scheme are trival but these guys...idk. I dunno. I need to stop being so judgmental. I've made a friend or two. So I guess I'll shut up about it for now.
What else...My brain is off as usual. I'll write more laters. ;)
Tuesday, December 18
Tuesday, October 9
Hey again...
I guess they decided to give us a reprieve on blogger at work. Too bad I'm tapped out intellectually. I'm tired. Pooped. Drained. But I'll get over it. I need more sleep. Depression=Insominia=Zombie=more depression. But hey! At least I got my flu shot today! :)
Gheeeey.
Bane started work today and as excited as I should be...I'm holding my breath. Its finally a steady job. A steady pay check. No more of this I might lose my job tomorrow bullshit. Its steady work and steady pay at a very decent wage. Plus, he'll finally have health benefits. FINALLY. I'm happy. But like I said...I'm still holding my breath. I shouldn't...but things with that boy have always been volatile.....blah blah blah...sore subject. I love him and his love for me is unparallel. His in ability to be responsible for himself as well as others irks the shit out of me. Its not that he's not caring...its that he was taught to look out only for yourself. Which doesn't fall in line with the code of family first...
Blah blah...I'll stop. He's trying...he's finally got a steady job. Things will be gianormously better. The have to be. Now if i can only get my life in order...I'll be set for life. Something.
Gheeeey.
Bane started work today and as excited as I should be...I'm holding my breath. Its finally a steady job. A steady pay check. No more of this I might lose my job tomorrow bullshit. Its steady work and steady pay at a very decent wage. Plus, he'll finally have health benefits. FINALLY. I'm happy. But like I said...I'm still holding my breath. I shouldn't...but things with that boy have always been volatile.....blah blah blah...sore subject. I love him and his love for me is unparallel. His in ability to be responsible for himself as well as others irks the shit out of me. Its not that he's not caring...its that he was taught to look out only for yourself. Which doesn't fall in line with the code of family first...
Blah blah...I'll stop. He's trying...he's finally got a steady job. Things will be gianormously better. The have to be. Now if i can only get my life in order...I'll be set for life. Something.
Monday, December 11
The day...the music died...or at least myspace.
I'm back to just being a blogger now. Whoop! Whoop!
Myspace got banned from work...so now...here I am. So much as happened in the past year. The main one being...I'm in love and its amazing. We'll be working on 1 year on the 7th of January. I can hardly wait.
I love him.
Myspace got banned from work...so now...here I am. So much as happened in the past year. The main one being...I'm in love and its amazing. We'll be working on 1 year on the 7th of January. I can hardly wait.
I love him.
Monday, February 13
First blog of the new year...
Don't ask me why I'm journaling in this thing...I don't even like hi-5 haha...I only come here to "stalk" the people that are too good to be on myspace. *LOL* Yey...I'm ghey. (JOIN MYSPACE.COM!!!!)
Other than that...Life is completely wonderful these days. My recently aquired boyfriend has managed to quickly eek his way into my heart and I can say with a true conscience there isn't anything I wouldn't do for him. Not that he would ask. He is completely amazing. Everyday that I spend with him (Which has been everyday for 2 weeks) is wonderful. We compliment each other in so many ways and we're completely (and VERY surprisingly) compatible in many others. I love him to death. I couldn't ask for a better boyfriend if I tried. We talk about things and we laugh about a lot more.
I dunno. It just feels like finally I can be myself and on top of that he ADORES me because I am who I am. We like the same music. We both enjoy a little darker side of life. We can turn each other on like no other. We can just be and god just being is like the best thing ever. *le sigh*
So for anyone that actually took the time to read this...thank you. Right now I'm contemplating something that might drop a lot of jaws. (No not babies or marriage...that's not for a LOOOOONG time...believe me) We were toying around with the idea of moving in together. I know it may seem soon but I think not only could it benefit us both...it could work. Getting a bigger apartment. And no I'm not pondering this for the benefits...although it does seem nice.
Its easy for me to get irritated when someone is taking up too much of my space. He's been in my space basically everyday for 2 weeks now. I still have yet to get tired of him. I love waking up to him every morning. I love him kissing me all over my face before he goes to work @ 5 in the morning. I fucking even love cooking for him and IF you know me...I don't fucking cook for anyone. For some reason...I can't help but want to for him. I do a lot of things for him, I find that I was resisting to doing for anyone because I didn't feel worthy to ask for what I really wanted or just out of sheer pride. I'm an independant woman after all...
There are so many things about Bane that just make me so content with myself...and all at the same time...be the best me I can be. He worships my body with absolute sincerity its mind-blowing. And sometimes when I look at him...He's just the most incredily sexy thing on this planet and I can't help but admit...I am indeed the luckiest girl in the world. Lucky to have someone who loves me so completely. Lucky to love someone that appricates the greatness that I am now. Lucky to have someone to call home about and brag about. Lucky to have someone that makes me smile and sends butterflies to my stomach with a mere phrase or gesture.
I love Bane. That's the only context I can put this in. Again for however long it lasts...I'm committed to making it last a lifetime. I no longer have delusions of grandeur. I have a reality that I created and that I am creating now. In the end, I want the best and I deserve the best and as of this moment...he's all those things and more. So perhaps a move is in our future. I would probably stay in my own building now and apply for a 1 bedroom. We still have a lot to talk about with regards to this issue because we wanna be responsible about it...as with all the major decisions in our lives. We're not just going, omg we're in love...lets move in and stuff. That's ghey. We got to make sure this is what we really REALLY want and its not going to happen tomorrow. So yeah. Something.
As for now...my only problem with this is...is that I really don't have a problem with it. Life is too short and we do what we gotta do. To base this decision out of fear...would be a detriment to our possibility. We are the possibility of love...in in that...fear does not exist...
Yeah something...Thank you again for reading this. ;)
Other than that...Life is completely wonderful these days. My recently aquired boyfriend has managed to quickly eek his way into my heart and I can say with a true conscience there isn't anything I wouldn't do for him. Not that he would ask. He is completely amazing. Everyday that I spend with him (Which has been everyday for 2 weeks) is wonderful. We compliment each other in so many ways and we're completely (and VERY surprisingly) compatible in many others. I love him to death. I couldn't ask for a better boyfriend if I tried. We talk about things and we laugh about a lot more.
I dunno. It just feels like finally I can be myself and on top of that he ADORES me because I am who I am. We like the same music. We both enjoy a little darker side of life. We can turn each other on like no other. We can just be and god just being is like the best thing ever. *le sigh*
So for anyone that actually took the time to read this...thank you. Right now I'm contemplating something that might drop a lot of jaws. (No not babies or marriage...that's not for a LOOOOONG time...believe me) We were toying around with the idea of moving in together. I know it may seem soon but I think not only could it benefit us both...it could work. Getting a bigger apartment. And no I'm not pondering this for the benefits...although it does seem nice.
Its easy for me to get irritated when someone is taking up too much of my space. He's been in my space basically everyday for 2 weeks now. I still have yet to get tired of him. I love waking up to him every morning. I love him kissing me all over my face before he goes to work @ 5 in the morning. I fucking even love cooking for him and IF you know me...I don't fucking cook for anyone. For some reason...I can't help but want to for him. I do a lot of things for him, I find that I was resisting to doing for anyone because I didn't feel worthy to ask for what I really wanted or just out of sheer pride. I'm an independant woman after all...
There are so many things about Bane that just make me so content with myself...and all at the same time...be the best me I can be. He worships my body with absolute sincerity its mind-blowing. And sometimes when I look at him...He's just the most incredily sexy thing on this planet and I can't help but admit...I am indeed the luckiest girl in the world. Lucky to have someone who loves me so completely. Lucky to love someone that appricates the greatness that I am now. Lucky to have someone to call home about and brag about. Lucky to have someone that makes me smile and sends butterflies to my stomach with a mere phrase or gesture.
I love Bane. That's the only context I can put this in. Again for however long it lasts...I'm committed to making it last a lifetime. I no longer have delusions of grandeur. I have a reality that I created and that I am creating now. In the end, I want the best and I deserve the best and as of this moment...he's all those things and more. So perhaps a move is in our future. I would probably stay in my own building now and apply for a 1 bedroom. We still have a lot to talk about with regards to this issue because we wanna be responsible about it...as with all the major decisions in our lives. We're not just going, omg we're in love...lets move in and stuff. That's ghey. We got to make sure this is what we really REALLY want and its not going to happen tomorrow. So yeah. Something.
As for now...my only problem with this is...is that I really don't have a problem with it. Life is too short and we do what we gotta do. To base this decision out of fear...would be a detriment to our possibility. We are the possibility of love...in in that...fear does not exist...
Yeah something...Thank you again for reading this. ;)
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