I'm sitting here contemplating going to sleep...but trying to find reasons not to.
So I decided to write a blog! LOL
I
had a productive day today. I got up and got keh and me dressed on
time. Out the door on time...made it to the sitter's a little early so I
deviated from routine and took my daughter to breakfast. She had to
bring her blankie into Dunkin Donuts with us...which I didn't even
mind. I ordered her some hash browns and juice...me...a caramel ice
latte that was super delicious. We just sat for a few and people
watched.
The we hopped back in the car because I still wanted
to be at work "on time" and I dropped her off at Miss Chrissie's. She
walked in without much fuss...she loves her sitter and her kids for
which I am completely and utterly grateful for...I am trying my best not
to think about the last time I will drop her off...it hurts and makes
this wet shit come out of my eyes. lol
Ugh
Today at work
my mission was to be completely productive...well really...my mission
was to go around my ego and be productive anyway....I'm already starting
to feel the push of not wanting to acknowledge that this impending move
will be upon us soon enough. 60 days more or less. My ego is showing
up by distracting me as to avoid cleaning my desk and starting the
winding down process of leaving OTSG better than when I found it. Which
believe me is no easy task. LOL Because all of us are consistently
busy and also because...I don't want it to be real. It sucks and is a
blessing I love my job. I finally have a solid repoire with a stubborn
co-worker that I appreciate...My bosses couldn't be more amazing and
understanding...and I make great money for not being a college grad
yet.
So semi losing the productivity battle til lunch, my
husband comes along to say hello. He's having one of his worst days and
only asks for my prayers of clarity. I can feel the energy behind his
words but I reassure him that whatever fuck up he may have
committed...that his opportunity to fix it would come..and that having 9
months of not having his ego get in the way of our progress as a family
has been absolutely amazing. An ego push was bound to happen and that
it was just a reminder of how letting his self-sabotage tendencies feels
like. This moment was just a stepping stone and our life is on track.
He got it because I meant it.
He also got me new boots because my other ones were a tad too small. Its nice to be spoiled sometimes.
Feeling
guilty for not being super productive I bid my love a good day and set
off to find something to eat in this late hour of the afternoon. I
drove to fill up my gas tank and then I started back to work. Not
feeling to hungry I thought it would be unwise to not eat anything...so I
drove past work slowly and went to panera.
Frontega Chicken and Broccoli and Cheese soup. Ate the sammich...saved the soup.
Back
at work, I started busting ass doing the menial things I've been
putting off...like organizing folders to be given to the analysts and
making labels...processing payments...clearing off my desk...
no sooner did I get started that I noticed it was quitting time....
30
minutes after I could have left...I did leave...being productive gets
addicting but I made myself stop because I really do just wanna hold my
baby today.
Zip to the sitter's and like always those chubby little arms raise in exclamation "MOMMY!"
How can anyone have a shitty day when coming home to that?
Get
baby in the car and channel my iphone to play the latest installment of
the mike o mera show...I'm addicted literally...laughing to those fools
talk destresses me like no other...and am grateful for their banter. It
helps remind me life is too serious to take seriously.
When my
little podcast ends...I'm usually home and time to focus on feeding my
little monster. Lucky for me I have my broccoli and cheese soup.
Luckier still...she loves it and eats the whole bowl by herself. Can't
complain...its better than just a few of whatever else I would have
cooked her.
After dinner I get ready to watch my redbox...Date
Movie...I don't have high expectations for it but I was pleasantly
surprised and amused. I did have some laugh out loud moments and dub it
worthy of my dollar from the redbox...Keh did me the honor of just
snuggling up in my arms and being still while we watched...she
eventually went to sleep in my arms and was out by 8. BRILLIANT! When
Date Movie was over my dad magically appeared just as I was plotting
ways to get my redbox back before 9 pm...the golden hour in which my
dollar rental becomes a two dollar rental.
I made it with 7
minutes to spare and grabbed some milk to replenish Keya's supply. Got
home 10 minutes later and decided to watch Ip man 2 before I had to send
it to my beloved overseas. I think I fell in love with the first one
deeper, although this one was very decent.
11 pm.
facebook around...myspace around...then I decide to write this note....
what was the point of all this diatribe? Nothing....just wanted to write.
Hi. :) LOL
Friday, September 10
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